Dispatches From the Cave: The Personal Blog of Osama Bin Laden

Saturday, February 25th, 2006 | 12:13 PM

Today started out to be a surprisingly nice end to a very crappy week. A couple of my wives got together and got me a new hat. It looks really good on me, they all say. In return, I decided not to have them beaten today. It was pleasant.

It hasn’t all been nice, though. I went on a walk through the cave after breakfast. I think some of my men might be losing respect for me. I haven’t really done anything in a while. Unlike the infidel, I know there’s only so far 9/11 can carry me. I heard some of them saying they don’t think this is turning out to be so great a jihad after all. Maybe I should strangle a puppy or something to buy some time until I can come up with another plan.

I’ve had writers block lately when it comes to thinking up attacks on the infidel. I’ve been trying, but nothing I think of can top flying airplanes into buildings. And it’s not like I’m going to impress anyone with more car bombings. That’s kind of getting to be an oversaturated market, right there. Maybe I’m just a one-hit wonder. *sigh*

Omar tells me he has been looking into satellite internet, and thinks he might be able to work something out. He wants to show me something in another part of the cave, so I guess I’d better go look.

Current Music: The Flesh Failures – Let The Sun Shine In
Current Mood: A little better, for a change ~_~

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